Graveyard seats may seem an unusual topic for a blog post, but in today's installment Irish writer Mattie Lennon explores the idea of adding seats to Irish cemeteries.
Graveyards, both old and new, are an integral feature not only of the Irish rural landscape, but are also painstakingly preserved and cherished amidst urban city sprawl.
I believe Irish people feel a deep spiritual connection with the past by visiting graveyards. But I have never visited a cemetery in Ireland where seats are provided for loved ones to rest, contemplate and connect with the past.
Since graveyards are such powerful reminders of the importance of family and our ancestors, Mattie explores if it would be fitting for Irish graveyards to provide a place to sit beside our dearly departed....
Taphophiles and Graveyard Seats By Mattie Lennon
"Personally I have no bone to pick with graveyards, I take the air there willingly, perhaps more willingly than elsewhere, when take the air I must."~ Mary Becket
It would appear that people of a literary bent are fascinated by graveyards. And why wouldn’t they. One intellectual told me that the only place they can concentrate properly is in a cemetery. One friend of mine who is fairly handy with the pen but not so sure about the existence of a hereafter would spend all day in burial grounds.
Being on holidays with him is a bit like being with the Bronte sisters. He has a good sense of humor and is not offended when I call him a “Tombstone Tourist.” Although he once informed me that the correct term for someone who loves cemeteries is “a taphophile." He then went into pedantic mode and informed me that his interest is known as “graving.”
While I don’t fully share my friend’s penchant for burial grounds I have accompanied him on several “graving” trips. (On one occasion a gravedigger took a look at me and said, “It’s hardly worth your while going home.”) I found the experience most interesting and I can appreciate the peace and tranquility to be found there.
A Country Graveyard
In his poem A Country Graveyard in County Kerry, Martin Delany captures it very well in the following stanza ...
"I have been through this graveyard many times savouring
The withering flowers wafting in the wind, the weeding
Of old graves, the scent of mown grass on sun beamed days,
The laughter of men digging new highways to eternity."
Thomas Gray described his surroundings in vivid detail in Elegy in a Country Churchyard. And while I have you, take a look at the line,
“The ploughman homeward plods his weary way.”
Now, have a go at juggling the words around. You may be even surprised at how many ways you can use those words while being grammatically correct and conveying the same message.
It is claimed by oneirologists that if you dream that you are standing, walking or sitting in a graveyard you can expect a peaceful, quiet and happy life.
Standing and walking is no bother but our burial places don’t offer many places to sit. In many countries you will find seats in graveyards. In the Jewish cemetery, many graves have a seat at their foot, but in Ireland it is not the norm. There are of course some with seating, New Abbey Cemetery in Kilcullen, County Kildare and the Huguenot Cemetery in Dublin are examples , but they are the exception.
Recently, an applicant from Gortnagluggin, County Limerick, was refused permission to erect a seat close to their family plot in St. Ita's graveyard, Killeady. On learning of this your humble scribe contacted every local authority on the island of Ireland. And guess what. The aforementioned was the only refusal for such a project in the last ten years.
Many Council representatives emphasied that they hadn’t ever refused permission for a cemetery seat. “Limerick You’re a Lady” how are ye.
There is no reason not to have more seating in Irish cemeteries. There is no legislation to prohibit the erection of seating provided it’s in a safe location.
I’m sure those who drafted the Rules and Regulations for the Regulation of Burial Grounds, in 1888, did not envisage the families of the deceased being deprived of an opportunity to sit down beside their loved ones.
In most burial grounds in the UK, families are allowed to sponsor a memorial seat to be placed in the cemetery and planning permission is not required for this. The seat is only sponsored and therefore remains the property of the Cemetery.
Thank You Mattie
A big thanks to Mattie for this wonderful contribution. You can follow Mattie's writing on his website, and he is also one of the researchers for the Irish Famine Pots Project we featured previously.
I love Mattie's stories, and I always learn something new from him. Today's graveyard lesson expanded my vocabulary. I had never before heard of a taphophile or a oneirologist.
Now I'm at a stage in life where ....
I'm learning something new everyday,all the while trying to rememberwhat it is I learned yesterday.
So for the next few days I'll be asking myself, "what is it you call those dream experts?
And I might even dare say I am a taphophile. Previously I shared how graveyards remind me of Christmas. And I confess I continue to visit graveyards regularly in Ireland. I stroll around these outdoor historical archives, inhaling the fresh air and taking in the past.
Perhaps you too are a "tombstone tourist" ????
Slán agus beannacht,
(Goodbye and blessings)
Mairéad -Irish American Mom
Pronunciation - slawn ah-gus ban-ock-th
Mairéad - rhymes with parade
If you enjoyed this post here are some other stories and tributes you might enjoy.
Eulogy For An Irish American Mother
Between The Jigs And The Reels
Maury
I love this post Mairead! When I was growing up, there was (and still is) a graveyard at the edge of our neighborhood. We kids played there all the time. As we grew into our teens, it was our favorite place to meet and just sit on the ground and talk. Almost every evening in the summer, there were about 10 of us there...we loved the place and how peaceful and quiet it was! Now all of our parents are buried there, and we all visit the graveyard to take flowers to our parents' graves. It still holds a special place in all of our hearts!
Irish American Mom
Hi Maury - It sounds like you too are a taphophile. Isn't it amazing, that even as a kid, you sensed and appreciated the peacefulness of the cemetery. Thanks so much for checking out this post.
Take care,
Mairéad
Sara McLain
This was a lovely essay. My older sister and I are what you might call graveyard ramblers. We find them to be interesting, historic places. Peaceful places. Once, in a hidden away little cemetery in the hills of Southern Ohio, we found the graves of several people from various counties in Ireland. We marveled how they'd ever found their way to that part of the world. But we hoped they found a home and good neighbors there. The Irish have enriched my country and I am grateful.
Irish American Mom
Hi Sara - Graveyards can be full of historical discoveries. How the Irish spread out across America and found new corners of the world to call home intrigues me. I understand how seeing those Irish names on the gravestones in the hills of southern Ohio just set your mind in motion. I love to hear stories of the Irish who made a new life in America - not always illustrious lives with wealth and fame, but regular everyday lives filled with peace and happiness.
Thanks as always for stopping by,
Mairéad
irishnannie
We love our cemeteries in my Family! When our children were growing up, we would go to the Cemetery after Sunday Mass (after, of course, we obtained our donut treats to eat while we were there!) and it was peaceful, loving and delightful! Are we taphophiles? 😉
Always, thank you, Mairead* for what you offer to us all!
God bless you!
Irish American Mom
Hi Irishannie - It sounds to me that you belong to a family of taphophiles. Thanks for checking out Mattie's post.
All the best,
Mairéad
irishnannie
And, of course, we vote for lots of benches!
Irish American Mom
🙂 🙂 🙂
irishnannie
Oh, my...and thank you, Mattie! God bless you, too!
Irish American Mom
Hi Irishannie - I too am extremely grateful to Mattie for all his wonderful contributions to my blog.
All the best,
Mairéad
Catherine
I too love wandering around graveyards, particularly ancient ones. In fact I have been in 4 today (a modern day one, 2 ancient ones and a famine one). I love visiting them as I said but I also take photographs of them and the churches for my welovedonegal.com website (feel free to remove the link if you think fit 🙂 ).
There are no seats in many of them but if I feel like it I just sit on a grave (the ancient graveyards are dotted with raised flagsone graves which make a good seat). I figure the departed won't mind and I am doing no harm as I sit in contemplation. But in relation to no seats in graveyards here, immediately one springs to mind that I visited recently and that is in the tiny village of Carrigans where there is a pretty little blue church. In the graveyard there there is a seat that a man has dedicated to his brother ending the dedication "Until we meet again". In that graveyard too there lies a very sad ending to a tragic event where a mother killed her son and herself to stop him marrying a girl she didn't consider good enough. The girl on finding out her fiance was dead killed herself and was buried in her wedding dress with her bridal flowers put in the coffin too. They are buried beside each other in that little graveyard in Carrigans. Who says graveyards aren't interesting and worth extended visits 🙂
Irish American Mom
Hi Catherine - Thank you for your lovely comment. I think the departed must really appreciate your visits to the graveyards of Donegal. My husband's family are buried in a beautiful graveyard near Brockagh on the banks of the Finn River. Thank you for sharing the story of the couple buried in the little graveyard in Carrigans. There are so many stories in Ireland's graveyards. I will check out your website. If you ever wish to write a guest post about your website just let me know. Thank you for sharing your work with my readers. We too love Donegal here since my husband was born near Letterkenny. Love visiting our family there.
Best wishes,
Mairéad